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 What I Learned From Watching Anime

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Merrick Rose

Merrick Rose

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PostSubject: What I Learned From Watching Anime   Thu Oct 14, 2010 9:14 pm

Band-Aids fix EVERYTHING. (One Piece)

Killing people with a magic notebook is only against the law if you get caught. (Death Note)

You can be mortally wounded and/or lose gallons of blood on a daily basis, and not die from either. (Bleach, One Piece)

Five minutes lasts a very, VERY long time. (Dragonball Z)

Giant robot battles are apparently an everyday occurence. (Gundam, Big O, Code Geass, the list goes on)

It totally isn't inhumane to stuff animals into tiny little balls and force them to fight each other. (Pokemon)

People build schools, corporations, religions, and entire civilizations around card games and toys. (Yu-Gi-Oh, Duel Masters, Bakugan, Beyblade, etc.)

Said card games and toys have the power to steal people's souls and/or destroy the world. (Bla bla bla, etcetera, etcetera, ad nauseum and so forth)

The cutest girls are always the craziest. (Higurashi, Elfen Lied)

If you accidentally kill someone, you can bring them back to life by doing a stupid dance and saying random words. (Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-Chan)

Underage girls can have impossibly big breasts. (Pretty much every anime and hentai ever made. Yes, I know what hentai is. That doesn't make me a bad person.)

If a woman you're trying to get in the sack with hates you, remember that creepy persistance pays off. (Any harem anime)

Anyone voiced by Steve Blum is an instant badass. (Again, pretty much every anime ever made)

Steve Blum, Scott McNeil, and Dan Green must never be placed in the same room together. The room would explode from the overdose of pure awesome.

Alucard from Hellsing doesn't have fight scenes. A more accurate term would be "Alucard brutally rapes *victim of the moment name here* scenes".

No matter what weapon you have, a person's fists outclass it. (JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Fist of the North Star, and virtually every other fight-driven anime.)

Kids are SCARY and/or FUCKED UP. (Higurashi, Elfen Lied, Neon Genesis Evangelion, "Now and Then, Here and There", Serial Experiments Lain)

If you ever have a leader who's unusually charismatic and things always go his way, don't let him lose the bauble around his neck. If he ever finds it again, he will accidentally usher in THE END OF DAYS.(Berserk)

Oh, I almost forgot. Your leader will also rape your girlfriend while you're forced to watch. Granted, he's just ushered in HELL ON EARTH, but I thought I should give you a heads up on that, too. (Also Berserk)
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PostSubject: Re: What I Learned From Watching Anime   Sat Nov 20, 2010 12:26 pm

Disproportionally long and lanky limbs and spirit wrangling is a very common practice amongst the aristocratic Japanese of today. (XXXHolic)
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PostSubject: Re: What I Learned From Watching Anime   Wed Dec 01, 2010 9:31 pm

Little kids + monsters = unstoppable (Blue Dragon, Monster Rancher, Pokemon)
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